God is taking you on a unplanned (by you) or unwanted journey. You have had your wrestling match and thankfully, He won. Trusting in God is allowing you to move forward. But this doesn’t negate how you feel during the process. Yes you are moving forward but it may be kicking and screaming on the inside.
This was a personal discovery for me. We are selling our house to downsize. This was not the long range plan however we both agreed it was the right thing to do. I keep my chin up, wear my big girl panties, and act reasonable about it. I didn’t realize how it was eating me up until I shared a disturbing dream I had with my kids. In this dream, I was part of a Jewish family living in Germany during WWII. The Nazis forced us from our home and sent us to a concentration camp. My kids both looked at me and realized why I dreamed this before I could utter another word! I was internalizing my grief over selling my home!
It doesn’t matter what kind of change you experience, it is important to grieve the loss. It could be a home, a job, a loved one, or an old way of life that was very comfortable. It is healthy to let those tears flow, God gave you this. Go ahead and grieve, it won’t last forever. For He is waiting at the end of this change with great plans for you!
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10